Private School Bitchfaces

Standard

Today, we have exactly one more week of school for the year.

I is excited. Very excited.

My guy friends, on the other hand, finished today, and were bragging about it.

Assholes.

So today, after finishing my English exam, I went into the city with my friends.

Today on the list of awesome people hanging out with me was MJ, Papa Willis, My ‘grandma’-who I’ll name Mrs Jackson, Smith, Slenderman’s ‘son’- named from this point on Pretty One, and the Flash.

It had been almost three weeks since I’d seen the Flash, so I was quite excited to see him. As nonexistent regulars know, we’ve been going out, though it’s been difficult to see eachother, because I live in Wonderland and he lives just outside the Rabbithole. In English, it’s a bit out of our way. Plus with exams going on, we’ve been busy studying, so the only way we’ve been able to communicate is Facebook.

So after a long Friday of exams, we went into the city.

The nice part of the city that is, not the messed up part that I ventured into in The Chronicles Of A Mad Cat.

And a lot of girls from my school were going there too.

Now, the thing with me is that my girlfriends have incredibly strict parents, so they aren’t allowed into the city. My guy friends are the opposite, so when I go into the city, it’s them who I usually meet up with.

The only problem with this though, is that people interpret opinions based on that information. And one person told me one time to my face that they thought I was a lesbian.

Honestly, it didn’t really help things when I just frowned and said, “Oh”. Because I have never seen being gay as a bad thing. When I was little and living in another city, I grew up next to two gay guys, and they’re the ones who prevented me from dressing like my mother. (THANK GOOOOOOOOD.) But I’ve never seen that as an insult, so I didn’t give the girls the reaction that they were probably expecting/hoping for.

By the way, this was when I was dating Potch. A MALE…I’m presuming.

So, back to present day. We all went into the city, and we saw…

Nope, s!uts is too rude.

So is Wh@res.

…Pr@$titutes?

Nope.

Ok, now I have one.

We all went into the city and we saw Paris Hiltons!

There we go.

So Papa Willis took his ‘mother’ Mrs Jackson and his ‘nephews’ to save our seats while MJ stayed with me and the Flash to get food.

It was at that moment when the chief Paris Hilton waved at me.

I waved back, but I was deeply disturbed.

This Paris Hilton once told me that I had no friends and I was a fat loner.

She is a lovely person…according to numerous boys at the school that my guy friends go to.

So I was getting icecream, when suddenly, Queen Paris-ite got up from her table.

And she was heading for us.

Ooooooooh fudge, I thought. “Flash,” I whispered. “Watch out.”

“What?”

“Heeeeeeeeeeeey, Cat, good to see you!” Queen Paris-ite gave me a sorta hug. You know, that touch on the arm and leaning in ever so slightly? Yeah, that one. “Is this your boyfriend?”

“Yeah, Flash, this is *insert alternate name for Queen Paris-ite here*, *insert alternate name for Queen Paris-ite here*, this is Flash.” I mouthed I’m so sorry over her head to him.

After she left, MJ came back. “Where did you go?” I asked.

He raised an eyebrow.

“Fair point.” Then the full effect of what she had done hit me. “She hugged meeeeeeeee!” I cried. “Nooooooooo!”

Flash and MJ gave me a hug as I faux-sobbed (“I feel so violated!”) and then we just started laughing.

“You should’ve asked her how many guys she’s done!” MJ told me.

“Grandpa, I’m not that much of a bitch,” I retorted.

“Well I am!”

“Then you do it.”

“…maybe Mrs Jackson will.”

Mrs Jackson didn’t. Neither did Smith or anyone else. But we laughed about what we would say if we had the guts to.

Thus is the reality of private school children. We can talk about someone behind their back, but when they approach us, we’re best friends. And I’m included in that category.

Fuuuuuuuudge.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s