Finally, I have been put on happy meds.
Which only succeed in making me more out of it.
I feel like screaming or smashing my head against the wall. My ability to think and function properly has been dragged down along with the feelings that I am not allowed to feel anymore.
The worst thing is not being able to hear Daniel. I can see him, I can watch him try to reach me, but I’m completely unable to understand what he tries to say. He may as well be speaking another language. Maybe he is. My mind is falling apart, and I cannot control my actions, and I don’t even have him to stop me.
I don’t want to be on the medicine anymore. It’s not making me happy, not when everything’s being thrown down to build up inside me till I burst. I don’t want to snap, I don’t want to be left alone with my madness, please let me out, I don’t want to thrown down too.